Does your parent repeat the same questions over and over and over again?

Do your elderly-aged parents ask the same question over again and again? I know this makes you stressed so in this post you will know the things you can do in this case.

In this article, I’m going to share with you four tips on how to best interact with them and I’m also going to share what you should never ever do when your parent repeats questions.

One of the first symptoms of dementia that your parent might be experiencing is to repeat the same questions over and over.

Not only is this a new experience for them it’s also a new experience for you and you might need to relearn how to best communicate with them.

#1. Understand the behavior

If you have an understanding of your parent's behavior it’s really gonna help you to respond to them in a helpful way.

The behavior of asking the same question over and over is a symptom of their aging brain and your parent has no control over this.

They have no memory of the fact that they just already asked you this question before maybe 10 times already.

You might think that your parent is doing this just to make you mad or frustrated or irritated and sometimes it’s really hard to tell the difference, especially in the early stages.

When the brain is just starting to change but let me ask you this if their behavior was on purpose and they’re just trying to get a rise out of you how would you react to them.

You’d probably really get angry and have an angry reaction to them and maybe say some hurtful things.

You might overreact and get mad what’s really discusses the situation to escalate you might storm out of the room. All of these things would cause your parent to feel bad really bad.

If on the other hand you always assume that your parent had absolutely no control over their behavior.

How would you react then well you’d probably be a lot more patient and understanding and sensitive and your responses would be more loving and more appropriate which in turn will de-escalate the situation so wouldn’t it be much less stressful for you both to just always have this assumption?

So tip number one is understanding and behaving as your parent has absolutely no control and that it’s not their fault.

#2 React to the emotion behind your parents questions

Tip number two react to the emotion behind your parent's questions. Try to get to the emotion that your parent might be experiencing that’s behind their repeated questions.

Are they feeling anxiety or fear for instance? If every evening your parent repeatedly asks you did you remember to lock the doors.

Maybe they might be feeling unsafe or fearful well you could just answer the question in a nice way. You can also add something to address their fear.

For example, you might respond yes I locked the door and we’re safe here, yes no one can get in here yes I locked the door and I’m gonna stay here with you.

This might help reduce their fear and make them ask that question a little less frequently.

#3. Learn to redirect.

If your parent is asking the same questions repeatedly within minutes then you should practice redirecting them trying to get them to focus on something else even if it’s just for a little while.

For instance, if every one or two or three minutes your parent is asking when are we going on vacation you can respond we’re going tomorrow. Can you help me pack the suitcase or we’re leaving tomorrow and levitation, where’s your favorite vacation spot? or we’re going tomorrow and it’s lunchtime. Let’s go have our sandwich

#4. Aware of your responses

Take a minute and think back to a time when your parent was asking repeated questions and maybe you didn’t respond ideally.

What was your go-to behavior in those circumstances think about your tone of voice your words, your body language, and your actions?

Was there some reaction in you that you wish was different there’s really no judgment.

Here we all react less-than-ideal sometimes including me but it’s really important to have an awareness and some insight into your own behavior so that we can make changes.

So if after the fifth or tenth time your mother asks you what time it was do you moan a little or do you

So For example: When your mother asks what time it is after the fifth or tenth time. You can moan a little or you let out a little scream on your breath and just say my dear face and shoulders get all the tensed up. You can crack your necks and body which gives relax you.

And answer the question with a positive smile. Or you can gift her a time table with sound notification.

But I bet you, it’s not in the same way that you did ten answers ago but guess what it is the first time your parent is hearing this answer because they don’t remember all the other times that you already answered that question.

So when your response is stressed and angry they’re gonna feel like you’re angry at them or that you don’t like them and that is not how you want your parent to feel at all.

So just pick one or two of your less than ideal responses and practice having a different response.

Start your day with the intention of improving your responses to repeat it questioning.

You know that your parent is going to repeat questions today so be prepared to walk into the room with the intention to have a calmer voice and reduce stress even when the question is asked for the tenth time keep reminding yourself in your mind I’m not going to stress out. I raise my voice and we’ll be kind and loving above all else.

This might take a lot of practice so don’t beat yourself up. If you mess up every learned behavior takes a lot of practice. You might ask why should you have to change and the answer is because between you and your parent.

You’re the one who can and your parent cannot change the way that their brain works.

And by making some changes in your own behavior and your reactions you’re going to notice a significant difference in the interaction between you and your parents.

And as promised here are the things that you should never ever say to your parent who repeats the same questions over and over.

I just told you that you already asked me that don’t you remember stop asking me that question or any other similar response.

These are not helpful and it just makes your parent feel bad and make them feel dumb and unloved and that’s the opposite of what you want.

Final Word

Answering their questions politely they think my child cares for me and loves me. Due to your clear emotional reply, they become happy and improves their overall health and social emotions. Hiring a certified, trained private caregiver is one of the best options can be.